Saturday, August 27, 2005

Once Again The Panhandle By Laurence Simon

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image from today.reuters.co.uk

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Katrina has been projected to hit the Florida panhandle.

The Florida panhandle's gotten a lot of beatings in recent memory from tropical storms and hurricanes.

I'd like to think that anything that's stood this long will keep standing through another one of these things, but Nature has a funny way of rolling the dice different with each throw.

After a brief stint in Miami, I'm sure the same breathless and brainless idiot-in-a-rainslicker coverage from MSNBC, CNN, and FOX will begin again in a day or two.

I wonder how the news consultants tell their clients to train for this kind of thing. Do they wire them up, throw a poncho over them, and then tell them to just babble incoherently for a minute or so in the shower while someone makes OOGAH BOOGAH motions throwing things around the bathroom.

"The winds have picked up to a hundred miles per hour, and the National Weather Service has said that- LOOK OUT FOR THAT TOILET ROLL DISPENSER! Did you get that? Did you get that?"

Soon, Hurricane Season will be over. Sharks will stop attacking swimmers and marine biologists. Even Natalee Holloway might be found.

The News Cycle rolls on, occasionally over the feet of those watching it.

A decent rider would stop and make sure your toes aren’t broken. Instead, you're told that you're fat, have high cholesterol, bladder problems, need to get out of debt quickly, should get cheaper car insurance, drink a cola beverage, see a lame movie with lots of special effects, and so on.

The great thing about books is that they never have a ticker at the bottom and I've yet to be interrupted for Breaking News while reading them.

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